Alora Fane

I've been wondering whether to turn my recent side project into my main project for a while, to use it as practise for facing the promotion-related things I've been avoiding...

First: I FINALLY heard back regarding mental health treatment!! It only took, what, a month?? I'll be seeing someone in person on Monday, who I'll hopefully be able to discuss and work some things out together with. I don't exactly know for sure what I want to get out of it: help finding a new path through life, or ways of coping with the one I'm currently on? I suppose that's one of the things I'll be trying to figure out during the sessions.

I was also hit yet again by what feels like hypomania (a frenzy of increased creativity and motivation) earlier in the week, which I felt compelled to spend on something, so - due to insecurities and uncertainties regarding Atonal Dreams - I ended up spending it on the side project I've hinted at in previous posts.

It's tentatively called Dreamons, and I wrote ∞ a detailed PUBLIC post about it on my Patreon ∞. That is, if you click that link, you can read it; you don't need to be a paid supporter this time.

(And if you're not, reading it can give you an idea of the sorts of things I post for patrons over there.)

I won't repeat most of the information here, but I'll include some of the same screenshots since (for some reason) you can't increase the size of inline images on Patreon (as far as I can tell, anyway):

Something I do want to repeat from the post though is that I'm wondering whether to focus on this project for a short while, since there's much less work to do on it than Atonal Dreams and it'd be better to practise promotion stuff with since it matters less to me if it fails.

I feel with Atonal Dreams I need to get promotion right with my first try because I've poured so much time and effort into it, and I'll be devastated if it flops, which - together with my inexperience with promotion and the much-mentioned TRAUMA!! - keeps me in a state of reluctant hesitation.

Plus there's also a chance this thing could have a longer lifespan and broader appeal anyway because it gives the player a lot of freedom for creating their own content.

Ultimately though I'm just very aware of and embarrassed about my failure to take the next steps with Atonal Dreams, and this is an attempt to try to reduce the challenge somehow. Will it work out that way? Is this a terribly unwise thing to do?? Does it just look like I've abandoned Atonal Dreams??? I don't know.

I'm curious to hear your thoughts about the concept anyway, either here or on Patreon. Is it clear to you what it even is? Anything I can clarify? Would you be interested in playing (and buying) something like this?

Depending on the response (or lack thereof) to this post, I may post about the project on Reddit or Twitter over the coming week to see what some strangers think.

I wrote last time about starting ∞ a new channel for my music compositions ∞... which I haven't posted anything new to since then. Bleh.

I've only put up three videos, but the views were dwindling severely on each one (currently 156 for the first, 65 for the second, and just 37 for the third), so... while I do intend to put up more, the dissapointment about that combined with the focus while working on this Dreamons thing left me with too little time and motivation to put in the necessary effort to prepare and upload any more.

Though I've already got tons of compositions I could upload, tidying up the score, exporting the video, and adding a colour to it all take time. I'm thinking what I should do is just spend one day preparing a few at once, to be posted later, one per day, or something. Ehh.

Oh, I also spent a while playing - and finishing - Crisis Core. How interesting. I have thoughts about that, but haven't found the time or motivation to write them out either.

I want to play the FFVII Remake next... but it's £70! That's ridiculous! I feel like I've been unpleasantly surprised by this before!! But I also read on Reddit the other day that Square-Enix isn't doing so great financially these days, and I have wanted to play that for years, soooo...

I'm just very aware of how little money I earn.

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