Log In or Create Account

20 POSTS WITH THE TAG <Doubt>

PERSONAL

14

685
Being An Outcast Hurts
10 months ago1,961 words
Well, no miracles yesterday.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

4

506
Alienation as the Crux of My Social Anxiety
10 months ago1,954 words
Some venting of anxiety I feel about the second counselling class later today. I feel like I'm the alien in the group. I don't mind being an alien, I just wish I could meet another alien to hide away from it all together with.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

1

694
Another Damn Depression Week
1 year ago2,016 words
YET AGAIN I'm caught up in lousy internal weather and haven't achieved as much as I'd like because of it. So frustrating. I suppose I composed a 16-minute-long piece of music, at least?? Don't know what I'm doing game-dev-wise these days, though...
READ MORE
PERSONAL

12

1,323
Frustrated by Mental Health 'Help'
2 years ago734 words
Ugh, yet another week where I've made no worthwhile progress on game dev projects, largely due to frustrations about the mental health 'help' I've been getting.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

10

1,133
Weekly Update - A Follow-Up Re Atonal Dreams Box Art
2 years ago1,720 words
A second post this week with some thoughts about art I drew a few days ago, and the kind of feedback artists hope for when showing other people the fruits of their hard work.
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

10

1,231
Weekly Update - Cover art finished; Doubts due to lack of childhood encouragement
2 years ago1,254 words
I finished some promotional art, which I'm proud of, but... did your parents ever encourage you in your pursuit of your interests?
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

17

1,536
Belated Weekly Update - Website Changes, Presenting Oneself, Pokemon
2 years ago3,011 words
I've finally implemented the revisions to this website that have taken far longer than they really should have done! Am I presenting my game and myself in an appropriate way, though? Also, Pokemon Violet.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

1

1,052
Head Pressure, Continued; Several Stressful Factors
2 years ago1,284 words
For the second week in a row, this post's mostly just an excuse about how I've not achieved what I wanted to this week, due to general mental illness exacerbated by several situational stressors. Bleh.
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

9

1,391
Weekly Update - Alpha Testing Phase 3, Week 1 - Quiet
2 years ago1,173 words
I announced the start of the third alpha test of Atonal Dreams on Monday... but so far only one person has provided feedback. It's discouraging, but I blame myself!
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

6

1,628
Weekly Update - Waiting for Alpha Feedback, Anxiously Procrastinating
2 years ago2,093 words
I've spent this week waiting for feedback for the Atonal Dreams Alpha... or rather, that feels like an excuse to shirk work more than anything, as I find the mere thought of the next big steps - or the alternative severe life changes if this won't work out - so distressing. I should try to play a game for the first time in ages to destress and reinspire myself, but I've been struggling to decide which one!
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

1

1,501
Weekly Update - Atonal Dreams Alpha 2 is Ongoing! (& Future Fears)
2 years ago746 words
The second alpha test of Atonal Dreams is currently ongoing! So that's something!
READ MORE
PERSONAL

12

1,924
The Familiarity Tightrope
4 years ago701 words
I've set myself the goal to finish off preparing the Steam page for Atonal Dreams today, but uncertainty's quite a barrier again so I'm writing a bit about it!
READ MORE
PERSONAL

15

2,408
Waning and Wandering Interest
4 years ago - Edited 4 years ago1,870 words
I'm really close now to the point where I can release a playable demo of Atonal Dreams... which should be exciting, but I've had a lot of days recently - today included - where I struggle to get to work due to worries about the waning interest in this blog and - presumably by extension - the game.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

4

2,207
The usual darkness, brightened by a look at progress
4 years ago - Edited 4 years ago1,460 words
I'm depressed and unmotivated. Again!! However, it's interesting seeing how much actually has changed for the better since another miserable post 3 months ago...
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

21

2,929
Some Possible Plans: Divine Dreams Prequel, Pokemon Clone, Marooned
4 years ago - Edited 4 years ago3,929 words
Yesterday's panic and despair transformed to creative excitement overnight, though I'm still not sure what to do next, if Divine Dreams as planned might not be financially viable. Here are some thoughts about some potential 'short' projects I could maybe release by the end of the year.
READ MORE
DEVELOPMENT

23

2,773
Rethinking Divine Dreams?
4 years ago - Edited 4 years ago1,843 words
I love my ideas for Divine Dreams, but making enough money from them is such a daunting prospect that maybe I should rethink what I'm trying to do.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

21

2,777
Can I keep doing this?
4 years ago - Edited 4 years ago1,598 words
I struggled to sleep last night because I was fretting so much about whether I can continue doing this games thing.
READ MORE
PERSONAL

25

2,775
32; Growth
5 years ago - Edited 5 years ago2,089 words
It's my birthday today, so I felt like I should at least acknowledge that with a post. Today's mostly just business as usual - spending my time alone working on this game - but there's a background of miserableness because of some discouraging comments on the previous post, because they're right. I've been thinking about how I need to change as a person, but looking back on how I was just a couple of years ago, I'd say I've already come a long way!
READ MORE
PERSONAL

5

2,339
WU 2020-7P - Depression, The Grapevine
5 years ago662 words
Depression's reared its heavy, leaden head these past few days. I've got stuff done despite it, but it's still annoying! Also, the attention my posts get is reducing over time rather than increasing. How do people - including YOU, dear, beloved reader - actually hear about games and keep up about their releases?
READ MORE
PERSONAL

0

2,843
Same Old, Just Venting (EDITED)
5 years ago1,346 words
Have you ever liked any games because they dealt with deeper themes? Or is the appeal of games entirely about escapism?
READ MORE